Friday, October 1, 2010

Chapter ??? Edit

A mere work in progress for one of the chapters in the future. In this one, the main character describes his newfound relationship with a colleague and its effect on the relationship between him and John. This chapter is not done and I am just posting it for responses on detail improvement.

Since the previous chapters haven't been posted yet, the main premise is, years after the death of John's mother, his father falls in love again, but John isn't too keen on her.

These stories are not to make fun of John Hamilton, a student at my school. Although the purpose of this blog's title was to, this story isn't. The name John is used simply because that's the name on the blog. Any usages of names of my fellow classmates in the future may be.


I never thought I'd fall in love again. But there was something different about her. Maybe it was the way she waltzed by my marble-slated cubicle during lunch. Or maybe it was her whole-hearted, off-white smile.

I figured John already knew. I had started coming home late; I even talked to her in front of him. But he wasn't always the brightest kid. I remember in the days after his mother died, he stopped walking, as if he never knew how to. He would keep crawling across the wooden tiled hallway, as if she was waiting for him on the other side. For the next week, he didn't want to go out of the apartment, play with his toys, or even watch his favorite T.V. channel: PBS Sprout. And he never seemed to catch my message, probably since he was too busy playing with Pedro, her son.

It was as if they knew each other their whole lives; even though to her and I, they seemed as opposite as night and day. Pedro grew his hair similar to his mother's: down to his shoulders, with a neat trim in the front. Sometimes it seemed even longer when he sat next to John, whose head was reminiscent of a brand new Chia Pet. And aside from just physical appearance, John had grown to be more of a slop.

After Pedro left, his room was a mess! His toys poured all over his floor; The game controller lie on his overworked bed. And his clothes lay on the ground like serviced soldiers after a civil war. The room was reminiscent of a battlefield, soldiers laying over the floor, the terrain completely ruined.

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